I just paid bills. Lately this has been a nasty little task leaving with barely enough money to buy groceries. But all things turn around. I caught up on my 2002 taxes so I no longer have to pay double AND (sit down for this) I got an increased child support check. It's not everything we had discussed, but it's more than the kid's medical insurance. I'm so excited. Maybe I can actually start saving money again and paying my bills on time and taking the kids to weekend getaways. Life is grand when you get what you work for.
My dad is getting married today. I'm kind of sad I won't be there. While I don't agree with any of the circumstances, I think you've found yourself one fantastic woman. Even though I think her self-made heroism is more of a fault, it's obvious she has a big heart. Best of luck you two.
Marry an idiot
Have children before I finished school
Let my children wear mismatched socks
Or their shoes on the wrong feet
Patch jeans with material that doesn't match perfectly
Serve spaghetti for breakfast
Drink coffee regularly
Weigh more than 135 lbs (and being pregnant counts)
Jump out of an airplane
I read an article yesterday in CNN Health “revealing” that people in the lower income bracket have a higher death rate due to accidents and preventable causes. CNN tributes this phenomenon to a lower level of education. I agree. I also think that poorer health care and depression are responsible.
Let’s start with the simple sneeze. One sneeze is an innocent bodily reaction to foreign objects. However, multiple sneezes are caused by infection. Viral infections are often seen as minor and innocent. You cannot treat one with antibiotics and the body will fight it off within two weeks. Those of us who are blessed to have affordable health coverage will simply take our sick butts to the doctor’s office and get a perscription for an anti-viral medication. We can afford the visit, and the prescription for the non-generic meds. Yet, for two weeks, someone who is strapped must deal with the sneeze. Do you realize that a sneeze exits your body at 100 miles an hour? What kind of damage does this cause. It is very dangerous to sneeze while driving. You cannot sneeze with your eyes open. Your body will not allow this. This means that you must operate a vehicle for a split second while something is exiting your body faster than a speeding train. So now driving is more dangerous than normal. So stay home and have some tea. But don’t sneeze while you’re carrying your tea. This is dangerous as well. Now you’re carrying hot fluid close to your body and expelling a sneeze at 100 miles an hour. It’s no wonder people in the lower income brackets are dying off quicker when a simple sneeze can take them out.
Depression. Any one can get it. Yet monetary stress is one of the highest reasons for divorce. I hardly believe that simply ridding yourself of a partner makes monetary stress any less stressful. So let’s assume that if you don’t have money you have one more reason to be depressed. When people are depressed they fail to take care of themselves. Which in turn causes them to have more accidents. Which only proves CNN and their intelligent medical society more correct. I know that when I am in a funk I am less likely to do the simple things to protect myself. I may not fasten my seat belt. I may not be extra careful when pulling that hot pan out of the oven. I am more likely to be intoxicated and if nothing else, I’m more likely to fall and get a bruise the size of Asia somewhere on my body, which is only the size of The Netherlands.
Access to health care is probably the most likely cause of accidental death and mental health issues. I’ll use myself as an example for this one. I suffer from sensitive skin and an allergy to latex. This means I’m allergic to elastic, which means that if I wear the wrong underwear I break out in open wounds where there should never be open wounds. And remember, this is a latex allergy. Obviously I’m not a huge fan of long and drawn out sex. You can imagine what the problems that arise after a 3 hour marathon session. This random nastiness is not restricted to latex. I have suffered from complete body rash that causes all of my skin to dry up and flake off for up to a month at a time. I swear, one day I will just have no skin. You’ll be able to see all of my muscle and fat as it is. This will provide the perfect opportunity to move all of that extra fat up to my breasts a whole lot easier. I do not fear AIDS. I don’t see the point. There are medications that can keep the virus into ever exploding into AIDS. The huge stinger would be not being able to have sex without risking someone else’s life. Yet a simple case of sensitive skin makes me just as undesirable as trying to tell someone I have the HIV virus. It took every fiber of will power to practice safe sex under these circumstances. Until recently doctors took one look at me and told me there was nothing they could do. I thought the most I could do was daily slather on the over-the-counter Hydrocortisone cream and vitamin E lotion. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that the whole thing could be cured with 5 days of steroid use. I’m sure that every one has their medical or mental dilemma. Not being able to attain the health care necessary only increases preventable death.
And so I say to the medical community “duh”. I think I deserve an honorary sociology PhD. Consider this my thesis.
I went on a date with the hottest man in the world this weekend. (Pictures will follow). Ok, so it wasn't a date. It was my best friend. But it was really nice to be out with a hottie. We even kind of pretended we were out on a date. It was fun to hold hands and cuddle up to him. It was fun to tease him about his chest hair and be silly. It was fun to have people watching us and think we were a cute couple. Even if it was only pretend.
If there truly is a god, I have a hard time believing he created me and my personality individually. If so, he certainly has a sense of humor. And not necessarily a nice one. More like the little kid telling "What's grosser than gross" jokes. Let's see, we'll take normal cute little girl, add an extreme sense of responisibility, leave out the self-esteem. Give her a solid sex drive with exquisite taste. That's like creating a food connoiseur without the money or talent to feed his own need. Not being able to stand the taste of normal food, he whithers and dies of starvation. While I'm certainly not going to die because of this, I think it's unusually cruel. If he was going to give me the sex drive of a 'ho, couldn't he at least make it a little easier for me to find men physically appealing? It would be so much easier if it didn't require the body of a model to turn me on. There are so many good and honest men out there. Why must I feel like I am settling and giving up a treasure if I were to actually fall in love with them. But then again, I could never fall in love with them, because I'd always be looking for something they had no control over and could never offer me. And yet, I'm not an extremely beautiful person myself. Beautiful people love beautiful people. The rest of us are happy with normality. And yet, here I am. Wanting what is unattainable. Knowing that this entire paragraph is full of inconsitincies and superficial childish concerns. And I know that it this is not the responsiblity of a creator but the reek of my own immaturity fueled by too many love novels. Knowing that I am an attractive woman who has no problem catching the eye of attractive men - only in keeping them. Knowing that somewhere inside me something is so wrong it keeps me from being able to catch and keep what I want.
